Is your small town really friendly?

Spoiler Alert: Many communities are anything but unless you fit the profile.

People are friendly to each other, especially their neighbours and friends who they know well, agree with their politics, and go to the same church. They are more tolerant of those who have kids who went to school with their kids and to those who were raised there. They love those with the correct mix of humility and success. There is nothing like a small town where you can band together and fundraise, build facilities, and ease the burdens of the injured, the unfortunate, and the sick. They have huge hearts until they see a threat. They still band together, but the outcome is anything but friendly.

If you are different, funny-looking, from a country that feels threatening or a neighbouring town the locals think is snotty, your small-town living experience might be anything but friendly. There is a weird sense of entitlement among people who spend their entire lives in one place. Locals regard their opinions as legitimate because they see each other as having greater local power and privilege than the newbies. They have been here longer and, therefore, think their opinions hold greater weight. Any change to that, even a positive change, can be seen as disrupting the status quo. Nobody likes change or that feeling that we are out of our element. The Disney Animated special said it best in a song from Beauty and the Beast, "We don't like what we don't understand; in fact it scares us, and the monster is mysterious at least...bring your guns and your knives, protect your children and your wives...we'll save our village and our lives, Kill the Beast!"

You hear a lot about "old school" in those communities while the infrastructure crumbles under them. You hear a great deal of resistance to immigration, where the Council tries to attract immigrants, preferably English-speaking Caucasians, who won't want to change a thing about the community and are willing to forgo everything they ever valued while at the same time, expecting them to invest their life savings into your community. I am particularly annoyed by comments that go, "When in Canada, you should act like a Canadian," assuming, of course, that everyone is Canadian the way they are Canadian.

I know there are Canadians who do not speak English in their homes, some Canadians do not celebrate the same holidays that others do, and there are different values even within the smallest population. For some reason, though, some people within those communities think they set the standard for all in the country and defend their point of view in a way that I can describe as not friendly—maybe even a little threatening.

So, when we say we are 'friendly,' are we really? And really, who needs who? We aren't having 13 babies per family anymore, and our systems are built on the need for employees. Thoughts?

Here is what I wish I could write in response to asinine (meaning "extremely stupid or foolish") social media posts directed at municipal leadership.

A quick review of social media pages shows that the population's expectations of Council and Administration are far out of line with their legislated roles and responsibilities. I've read blatant lies, partial truths, and other weird things that people say on social media and in print that make me want to ask, "Where did you get the idea it was Council's job to:

1. Anticipate the things you need.

2. Fund your wants.

3. Make staff work overtime to support your fundraiser.

4. Discriminate against one group to satisfy the wants of another.

5. Take your abuse because you think you are right.

6. Listen to you yell because you do not, at your age, know how to handle your frustration.

7. Take things further when you don't sign your name to a complaint.

8. Be bullied and harassed in the office and the street.

9. Be subjected to slanderous comments on social media.

10. Sit there docilely while you take out every frustration on them?

While it is true that taxpayers' dollars pay their salaries, no employer would be allowed to talk to staff the way many people feel entitled to speak to their elected leadership and administration. We pay the RCMP, too. Would you care to try assaulting them in their foyer? Will you please videotape it if you do?

While handling complaints is an occupational hazard, handling personal attacks shouldn't be. So stop it. You look bad, and you make your community look bad.

PS. Asshole is spelled with 2 (two) "s"es.

Quiet Quitting...Acting Your Wage and Respect in the Workplace.

I am a strong proponent of mutual respect in the workplace.

I believe in working together and building on mutual strengths. There is no room in any workplace for abuse of any kind—not from the boss to the employee, employee to employee, or employee to "boss." But assuming the person you answer to is not a (insert preferred expletive here) "Quiet Quitting" instead of just quitting is just as bad. We hire with the assumption that our new team member is going to do their best work for the wage offered, and if it isn't enough, why not just turn it down? To do anything else, I think, takes advantage of the employer, similar to when employers expect you to "be a team player" and work for nothing.

I believe in investing in the people on your team, public gratitude, paying for training, and open scheduling when possible. I also believe in cost-of-living raises and earned bonuses. We have part-time, full-time remote, and full-time office work at Matthewson & Co., which works because we have the right people for our work.

I believe in fair treatment. I believe adults should be treated like adults. I also believe that when we hire someone to work with us, we should be able to count on them to do their best and not just half-ass it.

I listened to an interview this morning in which one of the young people indicated she did not intend to work for a living because she believed her role was intended to be something different, a little more magical, and she simply did not want to waste her time. Yet, she expected her bills to be paid. This is a weird concept to someone like me who has been working since she was 13, babysitting and cleaning rooms to buy the jeans I wanted but my parents couldn't afford. Lucky for me, my parents instilled in me that you can have anything you want if you are willing to do the work.

If I thought any of my team members were engaging in "quiet quitting," I would, I think, engage in "rapid firing."

I'd rather see them working someplace that lights up their board, and if I cannot engage them, we just aren't the right fit. It is not my job to create an employee's dream job; that is theirs, and we will do what we can to help. One of the benefits of entrepreneurship is that you get to decide what that looks like to you.

Fortunately for me, I work with some of the most innovative, well-educated, and dedicated team members anyone could hope for. Everyone gives their all most of the time. Nobody gives 100 percent all the time, nor should we expect them to. Human. Who could ask for more than that?

Our workplace works because respect is mutual. Not all employers are (again, use your imagination), and not all employees are wastes of skin, waiting for someone to notice how special they are. The world is shifting, folks, but respect and hard work do not go out of style. Grandma was right.